Saturday, August 9, 2008

Pineapple Express and the worst remake idea EVER

Just saw Pineapple Express and I gotta admit it was a lot of fun. Normally not a fan of the stoner movie, largely due to a bad previous job at which it seemed half my co-workers rocked the ganj far too much, but the "Have you ever really LOOKED at your hand?"-type humour was kept to a minimum and it's always great to see the ever-gorgeous Nora Dunn onscreen, especially when she's cursing up a storm. Quite the lovely contempo ultraviolence as well; I remember the disparaging tone commentators used to take about action movies from the early eighties, especially the ones from the Joel Silver factory, but seriously? Commando is practically a children's movie compared to the flying viscera that seems to get flung around in the name of ironic yucks these days.

Okay, so I'm settling back with my kiddie combo (what? if I get a full bag of popcorn I'm going to eat the whole thing and nobody wants that) and the pre-show promo reel is unspooling and in "Casting Notes" it's mentioned that Eva Mendes and Nicolas Cage are going to be headlining a remake of Bad Lieutenant.

Go ahead, read that back to yourself, I'll pause for a moment to let it sink in.

Can you think, scouring your memories, for a film LESS needing a remake? The mind positively boggles. So I look it up on imdb as soon as I get home, and, get this, Werner Herzog is directing, it also stars Val Kilmer and Fairuza Balk (pause for a second while I swoon over knockout nutty goth girls....okay, I'm back) and the full title is Bad Lieutenant: Port of Call New Orleans. The discussion boards seem to express some well-deserved it a remake? re-imagining? sequel? Is it some in-name only franchise cash-in in the vein of Carlito's Way: Rise To Power or U.S. Marshals: Like The Fugitive Only It Blows? While I enjoy the synchronicity that Abel Ferrara did pursue Nicolas Cage to star in The Funeral (for the role Christopher Walken ultimately played), and the fact that Herzog is getting some Hollywood cred only forty-odd years into his directing career, I'm up-and-down, back-to-front flabberbaffled at this whole state of affairs. Seriously, I feel like I'm taking crazy pills here.

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